Rocking back and forth, simply a reflex, while viewing the babies in the hospital nursery. Standing here, she finds peace. Bliss is watching the newborns as they struggle to hold onto life those first few days. They reach and grasp at it, while it tries to slip away. Fighting, they solidify their “here and now”.
Turning to walk back to her own room, she runs into Jack. He knows where to find her. It took a while, but with enough visits to the hospital, he knows where to find her.
She has a bandage on her head this time. The fever makes her black out. Fainting in the wrong place can get dangerous. Luckily she was at home, she had tried to make it to the bedroom. She pushes her IV tree as she shuffles along the corridor. Back to her own wing.
“Does the nurse know you are out here? ”, Jack questions her.
“No, but I doubt he has noticed I left. It’s been a busy day today.” Autumn sighs and shuffles to the elevator. She is going up to the tenth floor.
The TENTH floor. The floor they put you on when they haven’t a clue what in the world is wrong. The floor for those that might be a little crazy, but it doesn’t really show outward until you get close. The floor for the weird. She can’t leave until Jack signs for her.
Autumn has visions. That’s all. Just visions. She has told Jack over and over, it’s not anything she should be going to the hospital for. He still calls the ambulance. When he first began to make the calls, he was asked all of the normal questions, now, they notate who is calling and dispatch the driver. The EMTs know to pack her with ice to reduce the fever or to use the warming blankets if she has the chills. They have seen her at both extremes.
Autumn speaks to the EMT workers as they load her into the ambulance. Mostly, they think she is crazy and simply ranting. Often, she speaks in tongues or with a much different voice. It frightens them. At least she is becoming routine for them, the urge to strap her down isn’t quite as strong.
Sedation and hydration, that’s all the hospital doctors will allow them to do for or to her. For that, Jack pays the ER doctors and the EMT’s a lot extra. No experimenting on his Autumn. For this Autumn is grateful. For this, she keeps her visions to herself as much as possible.
This has been a difficult gift. The ability to look at someone and see everything about them. Their innermost secrets. Autumn knows she will write down everything she saw while blacked out. She keeps a diary of her “time out”. Jack knows of the diary but is too fearful to read it. Someday. Someday, but not today.