Now I’m a Lamp
Wendy had seen Uncle Fester’s workout routine many times. He would sometimes allow her to help him, or if the workout routine was exceptionally fun, she could join him. Her favorite was wrestling with the monster in the pit. He was slimy so they called it “monster wrestling” when some farm people might call it “pig wrestling”. Monster was getting old, so the times it was up for a good game of wrestle were fewer and farther between. Usually, though, she just stood nearby holding her cell phone preset to 911. The EMT unit employee knew Uncle Fester very well.
“Uncle, why do you always end your workout with a few minutes of holding onto the fork stuck in the light socket?” Wendy twirled her braided pig-tail as she eyed her uncle.
“When Glinda the Good Witch comes to visit us, she always arrives in the bright pink bubble. Well, sometimes the glare off that bubble irritates the critters we have living in the dungeon. So, after my workouts, I go down to the dungeon and light things up.” Uncle Fester had been holding the fork, ever so slightly did his body jerk as though to the rhythm of an unheard song. Placing a light bulb into his mouth he said, “See, now I’m a lamp.”